we love mistakes

that’s what was established

before i arrived

but i’ve had trouble with it

how to correct and want to make better

while loving the mistake?

can i hold this duality?

i think the answer is no

i need to let go

there is no correcting

or making better

because the moment happened

and it’s out there

and can’t be taken back

this is what needs to be accepted

but there is a trying again next time

which can also be phrased as

the foreboding

“don’t do it again.”

i am losing my thoughts

losing my mind

losing time

losing sleep

losing myself

losing trust

i can only try again

and hope not to lose